The Beach

Half & Half: Hollywood, Florida (Part Two)

The morning was delightful, filled with the  type of activities we had hoped for when planning this trip to Hollywood, Florida.  Breakfast with a breathtaking view of the ocean, quiet time while reading a Jimmy Buffett novel along the water, finding a great spot on the beach and spending a few hours nestled in the shade of our sport-brella with Jimmy music steaming from our phone.  It was hard to interrupt  it, but we needed food.  In order to make up for the previous evening’s disappointment (see Part One of our trip), we decided to take a taxi to the strip of restaurants that we were unable to visit the night before.

 We decided to stop at Le Tub Saloon.  With colorful, weather worn decor to match its namesake it offered unique curb appeal to say the least.  A seaside, shack of a saloon built of grey weathered wood, we approached the interior with a small sense of adventure.

We found the perfect spot at the little bar.  We gazed upon the gorgeous view of the intercoastal waterway.  A cavalcade of watercraft passed by mere feet from where we sat.  We ordered a pair of beers to wet our whistle, browsed the low-key, casual menu and watched the cook as he grilled up their famous burgers and their fresh catch of mahi mahi.  And so without much prompting husband ordered a cheeseburger and I ordered the mahi mahi.

Le Tub functions on island time, but we did not mind.  We ordered a new round of drinks for each other, husband ordered me a “pain in the ass”.  My darling husband lovingly says that he loves me because I am one.

For the curious readers out there, according to our bartenders a “pain in the ass” is a pina colada combined with a rum runner.  I am not one for frozen drinks but this drink was the antithesis of a pain in the ass.  After chatting with a few of the other patrons, our food arrived.  Husband’s cheeseburger was massive, juicy, and indulgent.  My mahi mahi was flaky and juicy.

Things were going great.  Our bill came and because we were having such a good time, husband handed his card over without examining the check.  When he went to sign I thought the bill was little much.  I noticed we had been charged for two extra drinks we had not ordered – weird considering we sat at the bar the whole time. For whatever reason husband did not want to bother with getting it corrected.

We then walked over to Joe’s Tiki Bar.  As we walked in and headed for the main bar area by the water, the atmosphere seemed much different.  Whereas Le Tub was small, intimate, and authentically Florida… Joe’s Tiki Bar felt touristy.  There was live reggae music and plenty of patrons enjoying libations, food, and being on the waterfront.  I am sure in the evening the place would be lots of fun, but during the day it did not do much for us.  Besides our bartender did not seem interested.  After about thirty minutes we decided to get a taxi, but after paying our tab we could not get the bartender’s attention.

The Hollywood Boardwalk was across the street.  I figured we could see one of Hollywood’s main attractions, take a nice walk, and get a taxi further up A1A.  Bad idea.  The boardwalk was packed – which I suppose is a good thing for tourism, but it was packed with families from Miami and visitors from New Jersey and New York.  It was loud, chaotic, and full of cheesy gift shops and tacky restaurants.  Sadly, it was not at all what I had imagined.

We decided to walk through the Oceanwalk Mall and see about obtaining a taxi there.  We were shocked… every single shop in the mall was closed and the state of it all was heartbreaking.


Completely vacant Oceanwalk Mall…
… yet all doors were open, a few other visitors walked behind us in shock



Having failed in our ability to locate a taxi, we returned to A1A and walked.  Thankfully, the sidewalks were wide and well kept.  Sadly, we continued to fail in our attempt to gain assistance with transportation.  We ended up walking the two miles back to the hotel… whilst wearing flip flops.

Having faced another round of disappointment we opted to stick with something familiar.  The big opening game for husband’s team (USC) promised to be the source of recovery for the evening.  We called Rival’s Sportsbar to make reservations.

With the help of the delightful manager we were able to enjoy the USC vs. Hawaii game amidst a dominate mob of Michigan fans.  We indulged in $2 Dos Equis Ambar bottles and pizza.  However, quite close to halftime my stomach began to do flips.  Not good.  We headed back to the room and I was down for the count.  Not sure what caused it, but I would wager after examining my picture of the grill at Le Tub there was mahi mahi cooking right next to raw ground beef so that certainly did not help.

The next morning we had breakfast while overlooking the city of Hollywood.  We actually were not sad to be heading home.  Hollywood, Florida seems nice enough, but it is not my idea of a great Florida beach destination.  Rather it seems to be the idea of what a Florida beach is in the collective mind of New Jersey.  Having the fortunate luxury of being able to go to any Florida beach I desire makes me spoiled. Either way, I am thankful that going to the beach is all part and parcel of thisfloridalife.

A very frequent sight in Hollywood, FL



4 thoughts on “Half & Half: Hollywood, Florida (Part Two)”

  1. I’m so bummed that you didn’t have a better time in Hollywood! I like Hollywood, but you are right, parking and transportation are crazy. If you ever come back I would be glad to give you a few suggestions that I’ve learned since moving to the sunshine state!

    1. I am sure there are many redeeming qualities about Hollywood, we just had a string of bad circumstances. The beach and water is gorgeous, and of course the expensive houses are jaw dropping. Thanks for reading!

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